According to Chris Majer in his book The Power to Transform, when we say we "can't", what we are really saying is "I am afraid to," "I am currently not competent to/at," or "I am unwilling to,".
In his book, Majer in a series of assignments, states that "the object here is to bring your awareness to the conditional tendency of using 'I can't' as a hiding place." Many people use "I can't" to mask pain, insecurity, unwillingness, or a means to giving in to one's inner critic.
However, Majer takes the reader on a journey of self-discovery. His theory is that if you become more aware of the deep underlying reasons why we say we "can't", then the revelation can lead us to make better choices.
- You should become aware of what your inner critic is saying.
- Note how much this inner voice influences your actions and decision making.
- What are you going to do about it? What choice will you make toward the desired course of action?
According to Majer, we "always have a choice." In choosing to act you are in fact choosing to believe that you are "inherently able" to complete the task. So the next time you catch yourself saying "I can't", Majer suggests that you stop and consider why you're saying it. Be true to yourself and to others. Answer why you choose not to follow a course of action. In assessing ourselves, we'll find the honest answer instead of hiding behind the shadow of "I can't". For the most part however, we have the ability to successfully complete what's asked of us.
Read The Power to Transform by Chris Majer. For more info, visit the author's website http://humanpotentialproject.com .